Risky Business

It didn't take us long to find out that adoption is not all warm, fuzzy feelings all the time.  It is full of hard decisions, ethical grey areas, and downright sadness.  The excitement of welcoming a child into our hearts is, well, exciting.  But our child, even if the tiniest of babies, will already have experienced loss and pain.  Words no parent wants to hear associated with their children.  It is thoughts like these that are almost too much for me to bear.  And then I breathe.  And I remember.  Why worry when our story has already been divinely written?

This adoption journey doesn't exactly make "sense" in the way that we use that term.  I've had several people ask me why we are adopting.  It was a hard question to answer at first.  It just seemed like something that we were always meant to do.  It's part of our journey.  It was not a decision that we stressed over or worried with.  It came easily.  So my initial response was always, "why not?"  And then the worry shows up again.  "Will the baby be healthy?"  "Will the birth mother come knocking on your door to take your child back?"  "Will you be judged for having a family with different color skin?"  And, as anyone who's heard anything about adoption knows, a big question is: "How can you afford to adopt?!"

At first, the questions got under my skin.  I was being called out.  Challenged to defend my decision, which to a lot of people just didn't make sense.  I mean people never (*rarely*) ask you why you decided to get pregnant!  The honest truth is that we don't have the answers to any of these questions.  We cannot be guaranteed a healthy baby (but really, who can?).  We will do our best to have a healthy relationship with the birth mother, but who knows how that will go?  We will love this kid with all that we've got no matter how blindingly white my skin looks against theirs!  But we cannot protect our children from all hurt, or ourselves for that matter.

Well, I guess there is one question that we can answer with 100% accuracy.  We cannot afford to adopt a child.  It is crazy expensive (the topic of a growing debate that deserves its own post).  But as crazy as it sounds, this is one of the most exciting parts of our journey.  If we could afford the adoption, we would treat it like any other bill.  We would moan and fuss and write a check and send it in.  We would take the credit for working hard and producing the funds as a result of our own intellect and strength.  And life would continue with the focus where it naturally tends to be -- on us.

Not so when the money isn't in our account.  We begin to pray and believe.  Our faith is challenged.  We step back and let God do his thing.  God has already led some of our family and friends to help us in ways that we would have never imagined just a few short months ago.  Even our brand new church has come alongside us with prayer and support.  It's amazing.  And it makes me sad for all the times I worried about our finances.  We are doing our best to replace that doubt with belief.  Our prayers are bigger and our hearts are eager to see what will happen when we step back and make room for mighty things.

We can't do this alone.  But God has surrounded us with amazing people in our lives.  And we are grateful for whatever role you can play in our journey.  There are several ways to help if you feel so moved.  And to kick things off, we are giving away....

This beautiful green necklace! (Adorable toddler not included. Although I will negotiate on the toy frog. He makes incredibly annoying fun ribbit sounds.)

This necklace was made from recycled magazines by widows in Uganda.  It is a necklace full of blessings because not only did it provide a wage for the widow who made it, but it was sold as a fundraiser to help an organization that aids orphans in Uganda.  It's so special that this is how Riley felt when I told her we were giving it away:

 

So here's how you can be the lucky one to wear it:

1. Share our blog with a friend (http://www.asyouwishblog.com/).
2. Sign up to receive email updates (in the box at the top left).
3. Repost to Facebook.
4. Click here to read about our adoption fundraisers.
5. Buy a necklace or a puzzle piece.
6. Spread the news about Cassady Street (you can grab the button on the left to put on your site).
7. "Like" Cassady Street on Facebook.
8. Pray for us and others taking a leap of faith.  And join us!

Leave a comment or send me an email (asyouwishblog@gmail.com) and let me know which ones you've done or want to do.  We'll randomly pick a winner next week.

Love and gratitude to each of you!